25 January 2009

I've been Ticketed for a Maternity Clothes Violation

I wore a MATERNITY sweater to FAMILY pictures*. Here's your sign, Amanda.

I picked out 2 brand new Polo’s for Con, and 2 brand new Polo’s for Chase along with a pair of Kenneth Cole jeans for Chase and some pretty sweet designer jeans for Conner.

Michael had his pick of 1 new Christmas shirt and several others that are nice and gently wore since he wears The Monkey Suit 5 days a week.

Oh, but me? Little old momma? The one that WASHES all those nice clothes - sorts them and folds them or hangs them up? The one that wears jeans that are 4 years old and bra-tanks EVERYDAY that I bought when I nursed Conner THREE-AND-A-HALF-FRIGGIN-YEARS-AGO, well… I have NOTHING.

Today, I marched my happy booty up to Express with a generous gift card from the MIL and a mission – to NEVER wear my maternity digs again (unless pregnant, and you all know how I feel about THAT!).

Ironically, I did aforementioned marching to the mall in nothing less than a dress I bought 5 months preggo with Chase worn over the 4-year-old jeans. It’s that bad. (Sidetracked: Do you feel insecure about shopping and looking like a dud? I feel like they are all starring at the poor little helpless fashion dud. Just embarrassing. And then the HAIR. JEEZ! It’s impossible to try on clothes and not exit looking like Elvira. I digress)

I spent 2 hours in a room FULL of options. I tried on almost EVERYTHING there! I left with leggings, several nice dressy-ish tops, the staple nice tees (for the Pre-K pickup, duh), and a NEW PAIR OF JEANS – THAT FIT!!

I was over the moon excited to finally have something to wear! That is, until they rung me up. I won’t tell you the amount, but dang… clothes are expensive! Even with a nice gift card!

Alas, it was worth it to gain a bit of “me” back. I enjoy being halfway fashionable and the only way I’ve been able to achieve such for the past 4 years meant A) Borrowing something from my MOM (how SAD is THAT!) or B) Wearing one of 2 shirts over and over and over and over (you get the point).
Yay! Fashion SANITY! HOORAY!

Now if only the family photos* were postponed till after my fashion crisis was resolved. Sigh.

*Will post by the end of this weekend. Aside from my fashion violation, they turned out well.


  1. You're the reason I don't blog. You tell me life story in every blog ... Absurd.

    I have NO IDEA how long it's been since I've even felt comfortable in anything other than maternity! THAT'S pathetic! I mean, is it really THAT bad to still wear my maternity jeans? I mean, they are GAP jeans, so they couldn't be more comfortable!!! What's wrong with me?!

  2. Wear them as long as you can. Why not? Some maternity clothes are pretty stylish and you can't really tell. And they don't hug every curve which is always a plus. As long as you don't lift your arms and show those horrid elastic bands, then I say go for it.

  3. Sadly ladies, they don't make maternity clothes for girls the size of an average 5th grader. Hmmm... wonder why? ;-)

    So, I only own ONE pair of pregnancy jeans which cost (my mom) 200 BUCKS! I wore them almost every single day from 6 months preggo with Conner and from 4 months on with Chase. I also wore them for 2 months post-pregnancy with Conner and 5 months post-pregnancy with Chase. THAT'S LITERALLY 16 MONTHS IN THE SAME PAIR OF JEANS! I would wash them 2 times a week. ABSURD!

    As for keeping the bigger, less clingy tops and dresses - DONE! Many of the things I bought for those early and middle pregnancy months (oh you know the ones... where you can actually wear things that AREN'T BATH ROBES...)aren't actually maternity clothes but just sizes bigger than I wear now. So, I'm making some of them work but some of them I can't.

    PS - Lauren, your blog about the maternity pants and falling was HILARIOUS. Oops... I mean... I'm SO SORRY YOU FELL! Seriously, that's sadly funny... shoot me...

    AND STACI - You should just link my blog to everything with a disclaimer: "The following blog is pretty much all the things I deal with, just factor in a military husband and a 3rd child. Thanks"

  4. I just read your comment too. Imagine what a hard time I had finding maternity pants with a 35 inch inseam! Pretty much I looked like I was wearing capris the whole time. Gross.

    I'm so excited that you got some fun clothes! Is it my turn yet?

  5. Heavens Erin, we'd make interesting Real World Friends! My inseam is a staggering 28 1/2 inches... and I'm not very fond of heals. I find it difficult to catch up with toddlers in them. But they sure make vacuuming sexy!

  6. Amanda!

    You know GAP makes short people jeans, right? I mean, I should know! My maternity jeans are the absolute PERFECT length! I could even wear them with flip flops ... Which would have happened either way. But it worked nicely!!!

    (if you've forgotten - I'm 5 foot nothin' ...)

  7. New clothes are the best! HUZZAH!

  8. Silly Staci, I haven't forgotten you are a fellow shorty! I for some reason keep a running mental list of people I know that know what it's like to see the world from under 5 feet off the ground. Michael thinks its funny that I remember famous people if they are short.

    GAP jeans fit me oddly. But Express's jeans in "short" are the ticket. My mom found my maternity jeans at some specialty shop. I never thought to check GAP for them...


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