10 February 2009

You Say Grande, I Say Medium

I will never forget walking into Starbucks at the Ferg for the first time, a Sophomore in college. I had never been much of a coffee person, and to be frank - I rarely drank caffeine back then (and not at all now), but after 2 weeks of getting up for my 8 a.m. Chemistry class I was desperate. So being that it was my first time to order anything other than a hot chocolate from a fancy schmancy coffee establishment, you can imagine how scared I was to see all the crazy Italian words on the big order board behind the counter. I just needed some stinkin' coffee that morning - not a Portachelli Machiavelli Ricco Sauve Ravioli Meatzaballi (...please)!

I ordered a Caramel Macchiato ... that is... I told the Kind Girl Behind the Counter that I wanted the "one with Caramel about 4 lines up on the second column"... and that I wanted it "medium sized" and "not over ice".

Sometime later in the semester, I got the meatballs to ask the Kind Girl Behind the Counter how to pronounce "macchiato" and I've never forgotten it since. And although I specifically recall 2 times when I needed a larger size, I always hesitated because I wasn't exactly sure how to pronounce 'Venti' (it is, btw, exactly how it looks... but when words sound exactly like they look in other languages, I always end up with a puzzled look and no confidence because surely it's a joke and it can't be that easy).

So when Mrs. Abby D. over at My Crazy Beautiful Life posted a Starbucks 101, I was THRILLED! I know I mentioned earlier about not drinking caffeine anymore, but that's only because I have severe reflux. I LURVE Carmel Macchiatos and Pumpkin Spice Lattes and the other 5 things I've had at Starbucks but that I've ordered by pointing because I was too afraid to attempt pronunciation...

Go on over and read her Guide To Morons That Order at Starbucks Tutorial on All Things Starbucks! It's brilliant!


  1. I've never even been to a Starbucks, but I hear their white chocolate hot cocoa (or something like that) is delicious.

  2. Awesome!!! I feel so famous! Thanks for the link!

  3. Ah, caramel macchiatos are my vice. I however, think Starbucks is crap. I frequented my favorite local coffee house in town, The Pour House... until the bank foreclosed it.

    I haven't had a caramel machiatto in 4 months. AGH!

  4. Erin - never been? Really? I've always thought of Starbucks as a "right of passage" into college-dom.

    Oh Abby, I'm such a B-list Mommy Blogger... Thanks for letting me link this!

    Christina - The Pour House went to the Poor House? Sadly, that's hysterical. I loved this little coffee shop near my old house in Birmingham... they had amazing white chocolate somethingorothers and equally fantastic chocolate chocolate chip muffins. Oh how I miss Birmingham.... *sigh*. Oh, and Happy Birthday!

  5. I msut say, I was ENTHRALLED by this post amd HAD to go over to the "Starbucks 101" chick! :o) (THANKS!!) I now feel more educated..while, I knew how to prnounce all of these an usually dont have a complicated order, because I was too scared to place a complicated order...haha

    "Yes, I would LOVE to have a Grande White Mocha!"


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