12 March 2009

Oh Amanda, Hush.

What's wrong with instant communication?

In my case (as we all know that this blog should really be called "Amanda Likes Amanda and Talks About Amanda") it's that blogging is often a bit disconnect. I can type out, edit, miss my typos and then publish entire thoughts and THEN a select BEAUTIFUL few of you comment back with cackles of glee, wags of the finger or pats on the back.

...And I love it. It's like I get to have ENTIRE conversations and get in EVERYTHING I want to say without interruption.

I am a conversation dominator. It's fault of mine that I am both aware of and apparently steadfast in - part of my wiring one might say. 

Just today, our room mom for Conner's PreK class was holding a conversation with 4 other moms ... and by "holding" the conversation, I mean she's like a moderator. It's truly amazing to watch her do this - in the most delicate of ways she directs conversations and reflects them back to you in open-ended questions and "and how do you feel about that"s. It's a talent and she's one of the best I've seen. 

She's a listener.

I know. Right. 

When you talk to her, she engages you and talks about what YOU want to talk about, with 100% devotion even if you are discussing your preferred method of butt wiping (ok, mom's don't only talk about poop, i think...). She always asks about your experiences, your feelings, your situation with the occasional and perfectly timed tid-bits of her.

I want to be a listener. But, I'm not. I'm robotic in my conversation missions. If I don't get what I want said, I dwell on it. I ponder it for hours. I'll think about it till it rots my brain. 

You know who probably comes away with more from a conversation though? The listener. Although she's probably not gotten a single "AND THIS ONE TIME... GEEZ..." story off her chest, she's probably accumulated a million personal accounts of a billion different topics. She could probably write a book. 

Those few timed responses where she shoves a nugget of her best knowledge into your brain are so thought provoking, too. She has 3 children, all close together and her youngest is just a few months old. We were talking about how hard it was to get to and from school and accomplish daily chores and then I asked how hard it was for her to transition from 2 to 3. Her response was something like "The hardest wasn't from 1 to 2, or 2 to 3, but from none to one". I had NEVER thought about that. She's totally right. Going from NO babies to any amount of babies is most definitely the most challenging. This girl is full of the good stuff. Instead of just blabbing (like me) about how difficult this is or that is, she actually THINKS BEFORE SHE TALKS. 


There's a thought...

I'm not going to end this entry with a "so... I'm going to try to listen more and shut up", because that would be a lie. It's not that I don't hear what any of you have to say now, as a matter of fact, I hold many of you very close to my heart and enjoy our conversations more than you'll ever know. And I'm not going to stop talking/typing so much either, because it's these instant communications that are so incredibly gratifying to me.

Let's just say this: I'm hear to talk OR listen - if you ever need me.


  1. Crackin' me up! You typed the very conversation I carry on with myself on many days. I too OBSESS over what I didn't get to say. I guess as a hair stylist I HAVE to listen so much that when I can FINALLY get a word in I don't stop! At least I'm not alone as a 'talker'. lol

  2. I just love this post. I love that you think about this and appreciate yourself and people who communicate in a different way.

    Your writing is really good, by the way. :)

  3. Bonnie - I have always thought about stylists and how much they have to listen. What do you do on days when you just want the world to SHUT UP!?

    Heather - Aww... THANKS! I feel fuzzy now ;-)

  4. Amanda- you learn to shake your head and say 'mmmhmm' and 'really?!?' at the appropriate times all the while making a mental grocery list- just like any other self respecting woman! lol


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