08 August 2009

And Then The Internets Hated Me

Ugh. Teh Internets hate me.

First, twitter failed me. Not you - It failed me.
I get up in the morning and am all "ooohhh, let's see what the world did while I was sleeping" and do you know what twitter told me? NOTHING! How in Pete's am I supposed to know what happened if I don't have TWITTER?

Oh, right.... news... yeahhhh...
Noggin DOES NOT have a news crawl!
Wait - Noggin SOOOOO needs a news crawl.
Work on that, Noggin.

Then, as I twittered about - my computer is allergic to me and has decided to hate me for eternity. Alas, it's just going to have to suck it up and buy some benadryl, which I mean... yeah.. it'll be drunk on antihistamines alot, but hey... so am I... (JOKE. geez). No one can possibly like the feeling that gives you? It's nasty. (believe me, I know - did you know phenergran is really an antihistamine approved as a nausea medication? I got my my degree from Google University)

It started off with Conner removing the 'b' key, and from there progressed it's desire for not wanting to charge into "amanda-has-to-hold-my-hand-at-all-times-if-she-cares-about-getting-on-Teh-Internets". And people? I so care about the INTERNETS!

THEN, it kicked its feet like Conner after, well... everything, and went all Nutso Libre on me.

I do not need to babysit my computer - it's practically brand new!

I told on it over at HP, and they are going to get it fixed. HOWEVER, never guess who uses 2-3 business day delivery??? EEKS! THEY DO!

That's right! They are going to take my COMPUTER AWAY FROM ME for around 6 full days in which they won't even be working on it, but rather it'll be in someone's truck. Ugh.

Plus the time it takes to actually rip out the port and shove in a new one? Pffttt. Just shoot me why don't you! I'm going to need therapy. I really hope that's in my warranty with HP - Post-YoujusttookmycomputerAWAY Stress Disorder. Look it up, ge'ez.

Soooooooooooooooooo. After I scheduled for the amazing (sarcasm) people at HP to steal my computer from me, it decided to... well... do this:

It may not look like much, but these aren't my settings. It's like getting dressed in someone else's closet - and she's skanky.
And all those shortcut buttons? Yeah. They don't work. If you click them, it downloads that particular program. Which is great and all, but it doesn't save. This is a "temporary setting" and every time I shut down or re-boot, it takes about 10 minutes to load and then to get online each time I have to DOWNLOAD MY BROSWER.
Oh, and my files?
Oh! And to fix it on my own? I have to do all this:

not happening. (and just so you know? there's a step 1 and 3)

HP (hewlett-packard, not harry potter) doesn't know it yet (unless you are reading this HP, in which case, dudes? you don't do overnight or express? SERIOUSLY? Apple had my stuff turned around in a day. GET. WITH. IT.), but they will be addressing the Not Booting Properly issue. HECK! They might even be giving me a 'b' key.

Don't tell them Conner did it. (hp, you didn't see that)


  1. I know you don't want to hear this BUT (of course) I'm gonna tell you anyway. Something happened to my precious, white, has a fruit on it reminiscent of the Garden of Eden laptop. I took it into our local, ummm, GoE store and dropped it off to be sent to the fixers-that-be. That was Monday. Wednesday, I missed a Fedex delivery for which I had to sign. I wasn't expecting anything. What could it be? Thursday morning, I had my precious laptop back in my greedy, ginormous hands. As I've said before...

    Once you go Mac, you never go back!

  2. Oh, Blondie - how I know you speak the truth (sigh...). I've sent an apple in for repair before and had the same turn around. I miss The Apple SOOOOOOOOOOO much. The only reason I don't have a (working) one is b/c this computer was a gift. I am such a Mac girl.

  3. I have one better than that. We were without our 40" plasma for 8 days. Panasonic sux badly. They had to order a new "main panel" basically the entire inside guts all over again. After paying dearly for it and paying for the swanky 3 year concierge- I wrote them a nasty review and shoved it in the mailbox. I wrote all over the survey they sent me Worst experiance EVER!!!!!! Imagine no t.v. in a house of two kids~i almost died.

  4. That is scary! The thought of being without my computer for an extended period of time (meaning more than 24 hours) freaks me out.

    May The Force be with you.


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